The #1 person to buy chocolates for on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is tomorrow, and it can be a complicated day for a lot of people. Some people celebrate it with their partners with roses, chocolates, and such, while for others it can bring up painful feelings of loneliness and anxiety.

Remember (even though it's hard sometimes), a relationship (or lack thereof) can't make you feel any specific way. It's not the roses and chocolates that make you feel loved, it's your thoughts about your partner and your relationship.

It's not the absence of a partner that makes you feel lonely; it's what you tell yourself that your alone-ness means -- that you are somehow flawed, worthless, unattractive, or unlovable. Of course that makes you feel terrible and causes your confidence and your emotional health to take a huge hit! 

But what if you told yourself instead that you are lovable.

That you are worthy of love.

That the presence or absence of the love of another person has no impact on your worth.

That you deserve to be treated in loving ways and won't settle for less.

That you are complete and whole with or without a partner. 

What if this Valentine's Day you focused on self-love?

Because, at the end of the day, your relationship with yourself is the most important one you have. How much you care about yourself. How much value and pride you take in yourself. How much you believe in yourself.

So yes -- love on your loved ones this Valentine's Day, but don't forget to love on yourself. Many of us neglect ourselves because we put everyone else ahead of us. Tomorrow, give yourself a pep talk. Tell yourself what you love about yourself, just as you would tell a loved one what is special about them.

As Brene Brown has said: "Talk to yourself like someone you love." Or as Don Miguel Ruiz said: “Tell yourself how wonderful you are, how great you are. Tell yourself how much you love yourself.”

Treat yourself to roses and chocolates or whatever feels decadent and lovely to you.

You deserve it. You are lovable. You are worthy of love. You don't need anyone else to make you feel that way - you create that feeling with your own thoughts. 

And from that deep sense of self-love, you can more deeply love those around you.

I'm sending lots of love and appreciation your way - tomorrow and always!

Happy Valentine's Day!