What Adoption Taught Me About the Power of Belonging in Law

(Today’s note is a little more personal, but it also ties into our legal workplaces and one of the main reasons I do the work I do.)

Tomorrow is National Adoption Day, a day close to my heart. As the mom of three incredible children - two of whom are adopted - I’ve seen firsthand and lived the beauty, challenges, and lessons adoption brings. 

Our oldest daughter is biological, and I was pregnant with her while I was in law school. She was born shortly after I received my law license (she jokes that she already attended law school and passed the bar even though she was just “along for the ride”) and is now a college junior contemplating a career in law herself. 

Our first adoption brought our youngest daughter into our family from Colombia as an infant, and we had the adventure of living in Colombia for six weeks while her adoption was finalized (our oldest was two years old and the four of us lived in a tiny room in Bogota together). 

With our second adoption, our middle son joined our family from China at age ten, bringing with him not only joy and many gifts but also several undiagnosed invisible special needs that we've worked to navigate together as parents and as a family.

Each adoption journey was unique, and very few families “look” like ours. Yet the beautiful way our family came together taught me something universal: belonging doesn’t just happen - it’s built with intention, empathy, and love.

In many ways, the way our family was formed mirrors what happens when people come together to work in our legal workplaces. Firms and teams are made up of people from different backgrounds, experiences, and perspectives, brought together to accomplish something greater than any individual could do alone. Each person brings their own kinds of diversity and individuality. Each person brings their own hopes, dreams, histories, skills, and challenges.

Like families, legal teams need emotional intelligence and empathy to truly thrive. When people feel they belong - when they know they’re valued and cared for - they bring their best selves to work.

So, how can we foster belonging on our legal teams? How can we build strong “work families”?

Here are a few practical tips inspired by both my family’s adoption stories and the work we do in my "Culture of Caring" programs for legal organizations:

Create a foundation of psychological safety. Just as children in adoptive families need reassurance that they are safe and loved, colleagues need to feel safe to voice opinions, make mistakes, and ask for help without fear of judgment. Start by modeling vulnerability and curiosity.

Celebrate diversity of experience. Each person’s story is unique, and that diversity deeply enriches the whole. Look for opportunities to listen, learn, and celebrate what makes each team member special.

Be intentional about inclusion. Inclusion doesn’t happen by accident - it requires thoughtful effort. Assign meaningful work equitably, seek input from all voices, and make space for authentic connections.

Lead with empathy. Whether it’s supporting a colleague through a challenge or recognizing an unmet need, empathy builds trust and strengthens relationships. Notice how people are doing, and ask how you can support them, even if it’s just to offer a listening ear.

These principles reflect why I care so deeply about creating workplaces where people feel they truly belong. Our adoption journeys and the many diversities of our children has taught me the power of intentional connection and creating belonging. It’s a lesson I carry into every facet of my life, very much including the work I do with lawyers and legal professionals and every person I encounter - personally and professionally.

If you’re an adoptive parent, someone with special needs kids, or have your own adoption experience, I’d love to connect and hear your story.

Let’s commit to fostering cultures of caring and belonging that empower everyone to feel seen, valued, and supported - transforming both our homes and workplaces into spaces where everyone can truly thrive!