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When Life Sends You a Sign (Literally): A Lesson in Joy

happiness having what matters mindset simplicity

Have you ever noticed a theme emerging in your life? Maybe it's something subtle, like a word, a feeling, or an experience that seems to pop up repeatedly, as if it’s trying to tell you something. These themes often point to areas of growth, insight, or even just simple reminders to slow down and appreciate what’s around us.

This week, I've been noticing one word showing up in small but significant ways: joy

I’m writing this to you today from my parents’ dining room in the house I grew up in in my dear hometown in rural northern Illinois. We’re down there from Minnesota visiting my mother for her birthday. 

This morning, as I walked through my parents’ living room, a decorative sign on the table caught my eye. One simple word: Joy. It stopped me for a moment. Just yesterday, in my very first meeting with my new therapist before we hit the road to drive to Illinois, she gave me a homework assignment: “Look for times in the next week when you are experiencing joy. Notice how long you allow yourself to feel that feeling.”

From therapy in one state to a quiet morning in another, the theme was unmistakable. But how often do we truly notice and appreciate joy (or any other positive feeling) when it appears?

 

Emotional Intelligence and the Power of Naming Feelings

To fully experience emotions like joy, we need emotional intelligence, particularly emotional awareness. Being able to recognize and name our feelings is a skill, and research shows that the more precise we are in labeling our emotions (emotional granularity), the better we process them and the more deeply we feel them.

The Feelings Wheel by Gloria Wilcox is a great tool to help expand our emotional vocabulary. Instead of just feeling "happy," you might realize you're experiencing gratitude, contentment, or excitement. You can explore it here. By identifying our emotions more clearly, we allow ourselves to fully engage with them rather than letting them slip by unnoticed.

Why Noticing Joy Matters - Especially for Lawyers and Legal Professionals

As lawyers and  legal professionals, we’re trained to problem-solve, anticipate risk, and keep moving forward. That mindset serves us well in practice - but it can also make us rush past moments of joy without fully experiencing them.

Yet research shows that actively recognizing joy leads to:

✔ Stronger resilience – Making space for joy helps us bounce back from stress.

✔ Better relationships – Sharing joyful moments deepens our connections.

✔ Greater overall well-being – Allowing joy to linger reduces burnout and enhances fulfillment.

How to Find and Savor More Joy (and Other Positive Emotions)

  • Look for patterns. Are certain words, ideas, or experiences repeating in your life? Pay attention.
  • Pause and name the feeling. When you recognize joy—or any positive emotion—say it to yourself: This is joy. This is peace. This is gratitude.
  • Linger in the moment. Before moving on, take a few extra seconds to soak in the feeling. Let it fully register.
  • Create a “joy log.” Jot down one joyful moment each day to train your brain to notice more of them.
  • Engage your senses. What do you see, hear, feel, or smell when experiencing joy? Anchoring it in sensory details helps deepen the experience.
  • Share joy. Tell someone about a joyful moment—it amplifies the feeling and spreads positivity.
  • Revisit joyful moments. Reflect on them later in the day. The more we recall positive experiences, the more they shape our outlook.

Now, I’d love to hear from you. What’s a small moment of joy you’ve experienced recently? Hit “reply” and share - just as it will bring you joy to remember and relive that moment of joy, it will bring me joy to read your responses!

And know this - writing to you, sharing these thoughts, and connecting in this space? That brings me deep joy, too.


Recommended Resources

[Article] Tips for embracing joy in daily life | Mayo Clinic Health System

[Video] Ingrid Fetell Lee: Where joy hides and how to find it | TED Talk

[Article] Calling Emotions by Name | Psychology Today

[Article] How can you find joy (or at least peace) during difficult times? | Harvard Health

[Article] Joy and Well-Being | Center for the Advancement of Well-Being


Feel free to download, share, and use these quotes to inspire yourself and others!